discipline

Halting Homework Hassles

Middle school brings many changes: different school, new classmates, boy-girl relationships, hormonal surges.

For some middle schoolers, it's also the first time they have real homework — studying for tests and learning concepts on their own outside the classroom. But homework isn't the only thing vying for your kids ' time at night. Five hundred cable channels, chores, sports and other activities use up precious hours. Plus, preteens need a little time just to chill.

When it comes to establishing some basic homework habits, Mom and Dad can help. Solve homework hassles in your home by using some of these ideas:

  • Organization. Middle schoolers are becoming more independent than ever, but you can help them stay organized. Try a zippered three-ring binder with a folder for each class to hold homework and class notes. A daily planner can help students keep track of assignments and plan ahead for bigger projects.
  • Location. Set aside a "sacred" place just for homework. If possible use a desk with good lighting, appropriate resource books, pens and paper. But pulling out a crate stocked with the same supplies to use at the dining room table works almost as well.
  • Timing. For most kids, the habit of doing homework at the same time each day eliminates the age-old argument of "Can I do it in an hour?" or "I'll do it right after dinner."
  • Breaking down. Middle school might be the first time students write essays or multipage reports. Teach the discipline of breaking down big projects into bite-size chunks over several weeks. You're not helping them do their homework; you're teaching a lifelong skill.
  • Tuning out. Most of the current crop of students can naturally multitask — read, play a computer game, talk on the phone and watch TV all at the same time. But your kids will likely do their best work if they eliminate distractions.
  • Physically fit. Help your middle schooler establish the habits of sleeping at least eight hours, exercising appropriately and eating nutritious meals and snacks. Just a little physical fitness each day will increase your students ' energy and concentration levels.

Background Information

Journey of No Return
Sometimes as parents, we have a knee-jerk response to our kids as we're barraged by their numerous inquires and desires. Maybe it's time to stop being so negative.

When Not To Discipline
Parents should recognize when they should and shouldn't discipline their children.

When You Feel Like Calling in the SWAT Team
Are your children constantly testing you? This classic parenting advice will help you regain the upper hand.

Questions and Answers

After I spank my child, she usually wants to hug me and make up, but I continue to be cool to her for a few hours. Do you think that is right?
Answer

We'd like to be more unified in our approach, but how do we successfully move from two financial approaches to one?
Answer

How long do you think a child should be allowed to cry after being punished? Is there a limit?
Answer

I have never spanked my 3-year-old because I am afraid it will teach her to hit others and be a violent person. Do you think I am wrong?
Answer

It just seems barbaric to cause pain to a defenseless child. Is it healthy to spank him or her?
Answer

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Other Things to Consider

Ten Things Toddlers Wish They Could Tell You
It can do wonders for the frazzled parent to know what's going on in the mind of your little one.

TransitionsHaving a Baby, Preparing for Adolescence

Life PressuresWorking Moms, Stay-At-Home Moms, Time for Family

RelationshipsParents and Adult Children, Blended Families