How do I discover my talents and strengths?

Question and Answer

How do I discover what I'm good at?

I remember a meeting in my office when the visitor, an engineer, looked at me and said, "I'm 45 and I still don't know what I should be when I grow up."

Although he attempted to laugh as if it were a joke, I affirmed him. I said that I have heard that very statement from many adults who are finally being honest. This honesty then indicates a readiness to do something significant with one's life before it is too late.

Let me briefly comment on this person's dilemma and then give some words of advice. There are two myths that I have found confuse one's ability to make a logical choice regarding one's life work. First is the illusion that we can set our minds to do just about anything we set our minds to do. This viewpoint unfortunately has crept into most of our schools and universities. It is the positive mental attitude perspective. All we need is motivation, training and education. Surprisingly, this myth does work for a while, especially for young adults. However, somewhere at around 30 35 years of age the hype wears off if there is no intuitive talent to keep the career advancing. Slow promotions, loss of challenge, major mistakes or accidents increase. A job will go from bad to worse if the core duties do not match our innate talents. Natural talents are the heart of career satisfaction and ultimate success; and each of us have enough for more than one career.

A second myth is that one's passion is a result of one's innate aptitudes. I have way too many client files that prove otherwise. I well remember a client who was very motivated to sell stocks and securities. He researched the field thoroughly. He purchased an expensive wardrobe of suits, shoes and shirts. Initially I had warned him that this was a sales type of position and that it didn't appear to best fit his aptitudes. He was not to be deterred. He felt the training he would receive would overcome any of his limitations.

When it came time for him to begin calling brokerage firms to set up job interview appointments, his motivation came to a halt. He wasn't able to get one appointment. His tremendous passion was not able to overcome the lack of sales aptitude even with the telephone call scripting and personal coaching I provided for him. This middle aged man definitely had natural talent strengths, but selling for brokerage firms was not a good fit. His tenacity was to be commended. His wisdom in decision making however, was lacking.

So let's consider some positive action steps.

Step One: Know the difference between your learned skills, your motivation and your innate skills.

To really find the ideal career, it should represent something you are motivated to pursue (your interests and your values). Secondly, the ideal career should represent your innate skills, your talents. It is your talents that intuitively will understand the job and seek to grow through intuitive trial and error.

Selecting a new career because it fits your education or past work experience (learned skills) will not necessarily provide for a best fit.

Step Two: Know what a good fit looks like. Too many people are out looking for the perfect career, but they don't know what to look for.

Begin by identifying a job that you know something about, within a preferred organization (Step One). Ask to meet with someone who is in that position in a preferred organization. My clients have been performing these informational interviews for 25 years with very positive results. Busy people will take their time to meet with you if they sense that you are serious and will listen to their advice.

In case this step of sorting out the job position is too difficult, there are aptitude assessments and career-matching services that can help you determine your innate strengths and match these to best career options.

Step Three: The Job Search

It is important to understand that the majority of jobs (80%) are filled before they ever become a posted vacancy on the Internet or in the paper. Most positions are filled by word of mouth, an employee referral or by internal promotions.

To be successful in getting hired for that ideal career, seek the coaching of two or three people who are in the position you want. Ask them what they suggest you do. What is the inside track? Even Federal and State government agencies have a "hidden" inside track.

Yes, there are professionals who can help you plan and put into action a job search campaign. You can find some in your yellow pages under career guidance services. With all of this information, you have a big head start. The most important concept, however, is to believe that there really is something out there with your name on it. I can testify that my 30 years of helping mid career adults has identified several ideal fits for every client, no matter how educated or how old.